Parenting with Playfulness: Why Saying ‘Yes’ More Often Can Make Life Sweeter
Why Saying ‘Yes’ More Often Can Make Life Sweeter
Saying “yes” more often—both in small moments and big ones—creates more connection, cooperation, and compassion in our relationships with our kids.
I could talk about Disney (and I will at the end), but first, I want to talk about the everyday ways we can live in a place of “yes” and how it makes life sweeter.
I live in a duet with my daughter—it’s me and her. She’s 15 now, and for as long as I can remember, I’ve leaned toward saying “yes” in moments where many parents might default to “no.”
In American culture, we’re sold this idea of independence, self-sufficiency, and autonomy. Because of that, parents often feel like they should push their kids to do things on their own—
“Get it yourself.”
“Clean up your spot.”
“Put your dishes in the sink.”
“You’re closer to the kitchen—go grab it.”
Now, just take a moment and notice how that feels.
And then notice how your nervous system shifts when you read this instead:
Your kid leaves their dinner plate on the table, and instead of calling them back down, you just put it away.
You’re on the couch and ask your kid to grab you a glass of water, and they say, “Sure.”
They’re in their room and call out for scissors, and you bring them over.
You’re both curled up on the couch, giggling about who’s going to be the one to get up next because you both need something.
How does that feel?
Fast forward. My daughter and I had planned a trip to Utah—visiting family, skiing, all of that. But at the same time, friends were going to Disney. Family had just gone at Thanksgiving. Another family we know had just been a month ago. I could feel the pull—the desire in both of us to go back.
We’ve been lucky to go three or four times, but it had been eight years.
Then, with total ease, our Utah plans fell through. I looked at my daughter and said, “What do you think about going to Disney?”
Actually, I need to back up—because before that, she had casually said, “I think I want to go to Disney soon.” So really, what I asked her was, “How do you feel about going to Disney—just you and me? Would that be fun?”
Her answer? “Absolutely, yes!”
And so I did something I’m not always great at—I asked for help.
I used a Disney planner. I connected with my financial planner to make sure I wasn’t being recklessly spontaneous. And in about 30 days, I planned a trip that we’d be leaving for in the next 30 days.
And knock on wood—it’s all coming together with ease. I think it’s because of the support I’ve recruited, but it’s also because I’m living in that place of “yes.”
It’s been a joy to plan this with my daughter. A joy to model calmness while organizing a big trip. A joy to be a single parent who juggles work, home, parenting, pets, volunteering, and two jobs—and still makes space for fun and adventure.
And this is just the beginning—we haven’t even left yet.
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